Pure Gold

So, if M won a gold medal, he would protect it by putting it in a safe box that worked by scanning your brain to find your worst nightmares.  Then it would use those to scare you away.  Or, he would put a fake medal in a compartment on top of the real medal.  This boy is going to do something very interesting when he grows up!

Me, too

Boy wonder:  I hope I never have to live all alone.
Mommy, silently and with a big swallow:  Me, too, baby.  Changing subject.

Interrupt Rules

So, I guess God can interrupt Satan, but Satan cannot interrupt God. 

The shirt off his back

M and I were walking over to the grandparents' and I mentioned I was chilly and wished I would have brought my jacket.  He said he was okay because he had long sleeves, but his legs were a little cold in his shorts.  Then he said, "I can give you my shirt, mom."  I told him I was pretty sure he would be cold with no shirt.  He said it was alright.  "God will keep me warm.  If I think of you first and give you my shirt, God will take care of me."  Of course I took the opportunity to explain the saying to my literal boy, wondering if anyone else had ever really lived out the saying.

Almost

Mom:  It's time to turn off your brain now and go to sleep.

M:  In Music class I learned, "Zip it, lock it, then take the key to Talkative Land, then go and get it and bring it to Quiet Land."  Well, I added that part.  It's not really in there.  It's "Zip it, lock it, put the key in your pocket." 

Only my talkative boy would come up with that version of the quieting technique. 

just like tadpoles

Mom, I guess kids are like tadpoles:  you watch them grow and then you let them go.

Dirt

Sin is like dirt, but it's not like dirt from the ground.  It's the kind of dirt that only God can wash away.

Look Mom--it's a miracle! God made a leaf print on the cement!

Got me again

Mom:  honey, you don't have to button the top button of your shirt.

M:  then why do they put one there?

Lame Duck?

When we were driving home from school one day, we saw 32 geese and 12 ducks walking across the road (yes, I counted them).  One of the ducks had a hurt leg and of course, Matthew noticed.  

M:  You should call the vet.

Mom:  No, you don’t really call the vet for animals in the wild.  They either make it or they don’t.  There’s not a whole lot of “caring for” that goes on.   Sometimes the zoo can take care of an animal, but not very often.

3 days later:

M: Mom, you really should have called the zoo about that duck. 

Me:  No, he’s okay.  He was keeping up with the others. 

M:  God has probably healed him by now.

Me:  God doesn’t always heal animals or people that are injured.  Sometimes they just get along how they are.  Can you believe how many of them were there together?

M:  It was probably that some of them were babies that we just growing up and they look like grown-ups.  They haven’t left their parents yet. 

Me:  Yes, that’s possible.  Good point.

M:  (clouding up, probably thinking of big Sister leaving for college a few days before)  Do you think they will ever come back and visit their parents?  (Sniff sniff.)

Me:  Probably.

M:  Some animals are born injured.  Was I born injured?

Me:  No.  (Wondering...)

M:  Aren’t you glad I’ve lived to grow up?

Me:  Yes, I am.

M:  When I get to be a daddy I’m going to have kids.  Maybe I will adopt them. 

Do the injured kids get adopted? 

Me:  Yes, remember [our friends] adopted G--- from China?  He had a cleft palate and they got him surgery to fix it.

The strange thing about this  story:  M didn’t know we were considering adopting a special needs child from Colombia.  No, we really didn’t talk about it while Mr. Supersonic Hearing was awake or in the house.  Sometimes this kid just knows stuff. 

Under age

We don't serve aquahol here. 

Not even related

That's so funny that Santa comes at Christmas.  He and Jesus aren't even related or anything. 

Happy Father's Day, God

Child of the King:  "Dear God, Happy Father's Day. That's what you deserve.  The biggest best Father's Day. Amen"

another lap

I'm going to take another lap around like  I did yesterday.

What?

When I was brushing my teeth--go around again so I can get them cleaner.

Me, too!

On the way home from getting tacos for lunch:  I hope our car doesn't get started smelling like Mexico now....

Chess Moves

Playing chess:  Can the queen tackle forward?

Can the horse move in a lower case “L”?  (or just an upper case L)

I’m going on to your base next time.

Grossness alert but SO funny!

I just felt like I was going to throw up.  Good thing I kept my mouth closed.  Or maybe it was a burp but I kept the sound off.

Made in the USA

I was made to be funny.

What's a budget

It's keeping score of the money you have and the money you want to have and the money you spend.

Oh no...

Upon hearing that he would miss basketball practice because of the grade 1 and 2 Musical:

Oh, no.  I don't want to accidentally play bad on Saturday because I missed practice!